Chapter 19
Today would be one of those days! Nancy could feel it. She
felt a surge of energy that brought her to a sitting position and quickly out
of bed. She rushed into the kitchen and put on a pot of coffee.
After brushing her teeth, she sat by the kitchen window and
looked into the yard. Soon it would be spring and the leftover snow would melt.
She looked forward to that. It got her out of the house and into her patio for
her morning coffee.
She felt exhilarated, butterflies partying in her chest and
she couldn’t wait for tonight. She finished her coffee and rushed into the
bedroom.
From the closet, she pulled out a black fitted shift dress.
She looked at it for a moment and memories came alive in hues of crimson and
garnet. In the darkness, she could see the shiny blade in her hands; feel the
cold metal excitedly.
She hung the dress on the closet doorknob and sat at the
foot of the bed. In her mind, she began to recount the details of each
encounter. The dark bars, the musty smell of cigarettes, the jukebox playing
80’s music. They were all the same. Then one by one, she saw their faces. She
didn’t remember their names, but their faces were etched in her memory forever.
These men gave her life meaning. These men had to die so that she could live.
Her eyes welled up
with angry tears. Nancy can’t do things
for herself!
She turned to the mirror and looked at her reflection. “I
have to be strong for you! You’re dead inside, weak… you couldn’t even stand up
for Maggie! You are disgusting!”
Nancy’s heart pounded rapidly. Her reflection, distorted
with the anger that had festered for so many years, looked back at her
approvingly.
It said, “Go, do for me what I can’t do for myself.”
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